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I don’t consider myself a funny person. I do LOVE a lot of funny people (and some of them even let me hang out with them). In social situations, I’m the quiet one with the occasional zinger. Yet I’m pretty sure nobody would describe me as a funny girl.

But sometimes my writing makes people laugh, and I’ve become curious about this. At a writing retreat in Italy last month, I read an excerpt of a story to a room of about 20 people (I’m pretty sure most of them considered me a quiet, serious person, at least until then), and they laughed—quite a bit actually. Possibly out of shock that I could be funny.

Nicole with a funny face

It’s got me thinking about how humour is one of the best ways to amp up that know-like-trust factor we need to build relationships—both online and off. But we aren’t all born with instant wit. So how can the rest of us be funny—in writing?

1. Become an astute observer of the human condition.

Most of the time, you don’t even have to add a thing: the everyday absurdities of being human are enough to crack us all up. The problem is, most of the time we’re too busy or distracted (or grumpy?) to notice the ridiculous things happening around us, and sometimes directly to us. That’s where you, funny writer, can simply hold up a mirror to the world and say “See? This.”

When you do that, you give your reader the opportunity to experience that affirming flash of recognition. “Yes, that!” they think. “Of course.” And then they remember that YOU were the smart one who pointed out something insanely funny that they’d been half-noticing all along.

2. Push it a little bit further.

This is what comedians do so well. They dig up those funny every occurrences and take them a step further, torquing them to become satire or parody. This is hard to pull off but impossible not to notice. (I want to link to Amy Schumer videos here, but I won’t because a) they’re a bit crass and b) we all have work to do.)

I pushed it a little bit further last week when I wrote about how lying to yourself is the best way to survive your first year in business (I published this on Medium—check it out). Of course, I knew the premise was a bit of an exaggeration. But that’s also why it worked.

3. Let the joke be on you.

Remember when Louis CK talked about changing his daughter’s diapers, and we were all appalled but laughed anyway? While toilet talk might not be your style, revealing a few honest, intimate details about yourself (although those closest to you may also be involved) is a great way to make people smile. For example, this post about dashes and hyphens could have been really boring, but I managed to lighten things up by making fun of myself for having a minor existential crisis on my birthday every year. (But you have those too, yeah?)

A little bit of self-mockery can be incredibly humanizing. Poking fun at yourself shows strength of character, humility, and the small imperfections that make people want to be your friend.

4. Write how you speak.

My clients are very funny. In conversation, they say zany things and use wacky phrases. I know they crack their friends up on the regular. But sometimes when they sit down to write FOR PUBLICATION, they stiffen up. They second-guess themselves. They forget that the thing they instinctively want to say is probably exactly what they should say.

Write how you speak, my friend. Don’t be afraid to make the same jokes you’d make if you were chatting with your reader in a coffee shop—or even in a pub.

If this is hard for you, let me remind you of the long-game: the more you write, the easier it becomes to write how you speak.

So just keep going and they’ll be laughing at you—with you!—in no time.

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